I have always thought of myself as a fairly conventional and ordinary person. OK, probably not entirely ‘ordinary’ and even not entirely ‘conventional’ – there has been too much evidence to the contrary over the years – but I have never thought of myself as someone who achieves ‘impossible’ feats.
Then again, most of our friends believed that it is not possible to pay off £100,000 ($157,000) worth of debt in three years; even our financial advisor laughed when I mentioned to him what we have set out to achieve – he thought I am joking (well, you all know me) and in response mentioned something about winning the lottery. Between you and me, the lottery was not even in it; and winning the lottery is not impossible either – it is just so not worth pursuing this possibility.
Another impossible feat was me running a marathon. Eight years ago, anybody who had known me for any length of time would have told you that my favourite sport was sitting in coffee bars. You should have seen my closest friend’s face when I told him that I’ve started running.
‘You? Running.’ – he exclaimed – ‘I want to see what you look like after running 10K.’.
I loved him dearly; that is why after my next 10K race I took a picture a sent it to him. It was a muddy race and I had finished in 53 minutes; so not a pretty sight but he did want to see. I ran marathons and now I want to run an ultra-marathon.
Believe it or not, this article is not actually all about me doing ‘impossible’ things. But suddenly realising that I do have a bit of a history with ‘impossible’ made me think:
What stands between us – each and every one of us – and extraordinary possibilities?
In my opinion there are three factors that are in the way: a) we refuse to acknowledge the possibility; b) we don’t act on it; and c) we decide what to go for because of who we are.
Acknowledge possibilities
There are many things that were considered ‘impossible’ until someone went and did them. It was impossible to fly, to get to the US in six hours, to talk to people at a distance and to have light during the night. It was considered impossible to run a mile in four minutes (and under) and recently I saw a clip of a gymnast entitled ‘Please, someone tell this girl that this is impossible’.
You know what the first difference between the people who do these impossible feats and the ones who don’t is that the former have somehow allowed the possibility. Once the possibility of achieving something is acknowledged the rest is a technicality of working out how to do it.
Acting on possibilities
The second difference is that the people who defy the impossible act. Roger Bannister (the guy who run a four minute mile first in 1954) didn’t simply hang about thinking: ‘Well, it is possible but let’s have another sandwich.’ No, he trained with the focus of an addict. So did the gymnast, btw.
Most people, however, don’t act. In fact, the other day I was on the bus (yep, trying to reduce my carbon footprint) and overheard this young girl, probably a student, talking on the phone. What she was saying is:
“No, I haven’t phoned them. Why would I do that? So that I hear…”
How do you know what you will hear if you haven’t phoned? Go figure!
A variation on this refusal to act is
“Oh, this is never going to work!”
Now, there is nothing wrong with saying that something doesn’t work but timing is everything: you can’t say this before you have even tried.
Decide for who you want to be, not who you are
Recently, I had a conversation with a friend who was trying to decide which one of two very different career paths to take. After setting out the two choices he said:
‘But choosing [insert a career path of your choice] is tricky. I am not sure that I am [insert the same].’
Now, this was very interesting. This friend of mine is clever, able, competent and adventurous. About five years ago, he moved to the UK from another country; and he moved his family. During the move (and shortly after) their lives were in turmoil: his children went to school and didn’t speak a word of English; his wife had no job; they had to find a house, make a life and meet new friends. They managed all of that! Why? Because my friend bravely took a path in his life that he didn’t know well; he was not thinking that ‘…he isn’t […]’.
And here is the problem:
Five years ago my friend didn’t choose for who he is; he made a decision about who he wants to be.
If we wish make life changing decisions we ought to:
- Have an idea of what we want to be;
- Decide not on the basis of what we are but what we want to be;
- Work out the conditions that will get us there;
- Create the conditions that will get us there.
This is how ‘impossible is nothing’ – because ‘impossible’ is usually not something we have tried and failed to achieve; it is the thing that we never allowed ourselves to see as a possibility.
Have you achieved any impossible feats and how?
photo credit: [Sugar Rush Creations] via photopin cc
My mantra is “Impossible is just an Opinion”. Achieving financial freedom in 7 years may have seemed impossible, but I had a plan. I think that is the key to achieving the impossible.
@Krant: You are on to something here; ‘impossible’ is an opinion and also when one gets to a plan getting there becomes a ‘technical matter’ as I say.
Inspring post. I think that it’s important to A) be able to have the guts to dream big, B) overcome inertia and actually take the steps to make progress, and C) have self-discipline. I’d attribute my successes to taking that approach, and times I fell short to not taking this type of approach.
@DPF: Do you think that ‘success’ and the ‘impossible’ may be different. I am not saying they are, just thinking very publicly, I suppose.
This is a great post. There are many things that can look daunting at first, especially if you have never tried it. But once you ‘just do it,’ you can usually make it work! Even if it doesn’t, you can say “That didn’t work because of XX,” not “that thing is impossible.” You can learn from your mistakes and move on to make it successful.
@Alice: Exactly! Except that I prefer to think about it as ‘playing’ – it is rather impressive what we can achieve when we put an element of fun in the process and play :).
As long as one differentiates between the impossible and the stupid then I am totally in agreement. For example, you can’t get a 6 pack abs in training abs for 6 minutes.
@Jai: Ha, ha. Having a 6 pack would be impossible for me (had it before my son and to have him had a C-section; so…). But were I to try it I’ll work out the conditions under which it is possible.
Honestly, I have never achieved anything that I would have thought is impossible.I don’t set myself up for failure, because I know how I am. My motivation ebbs and flows, and I tend to be a “phase” person. I know they aren’t impossible, it’s just whether I’m willing to stick with it for long enough.
@Daisy: Thanks for mentioning this. In fact, what I did is to ‘chunk it down’. What one wishes to be in five or ten years may sound like a lost cause. But if one figures out the stages to get there…well, this may work :).
Your running is very inspiring! I have pushed myself but not really to “impossible” things, although I am sure if you work every day towards your goal you will get there, whatever it is.
@Pauline: You haven’t done too badly on the ‘impossible’ front, I think.
We are so negatively affected by the media and the background anxiety it can create, it can be a real challenge to think differently. Before the Marathon came to my City, runners were a tiny minority and seen as strange, running is now a strong part of the culture with 2 Park Runs organised by volunteers every Saturday each attracting over 350 runners. A few positive, inspiring people can make a massive difference just by shsring their energy. We need to celebrate our achievements and learn from, rather than repeatedly dissect our not so successful ventures.
@Starjump3r: Quite right. But I do think that we have to question what we find in the media and stand firmly by our beliefs about right and wrong. Each of us has the power to change the world – we just have to start on a very small scale. One person at the time – I started with myself.
Identify battles that are manageable in small steps seems to be a mantra well-connected to your excellent insight above.
@Mike: I used to think about battles but then started finding them really tiring. Now I prefer to think about dreams – the kind that can be planned, strategised, worked on and lived without fear. In fact, recently at a workshop I got rather cross with an official from a major international organisation who had a warning: ‘Watch your dreams for they can turn into nightmares.’ A silly thing to tell people striving for social change, I thought.
As I’ve always said, your body can achieve what your mind can conceive. The only one stopping yourself from reaching your dreams is you. You need to overcame your fears and start to decide and plan about what you want to be.
@KC: There, there :). We are on the same wavelength here – what I think is worth doing is getting the whole ‘impossible is nothing’ thing from a slogan to a workable proposition.
From what I’ve seen, most people just blindly stumble through life following the path of least resistance….
@Marie: Unfortunately I have to agree with that. It is in fact worse: people stumble through life, things happen to them and they wonder why. But soome will never change.
Not all are built the same or think alike. My wife likes the comfort of working at a big company and I find myself sitting high goals that everyone else thinks is impossible. Then I meet people like myself that say nice goal now do something about achieving it. Some people like to just conform to the standards set by others.
@Thomas: Quite right; this ‘impossible’ thing is not for everyone. But throughout the years I have been learning how to know my friends and who to keep; these are the people who don’t say: ‘Really? This is impossible.’ but ‘Go for it! Can I help with something.’